cruise control…..

I’m in the chatty mood right now……just finished a few glasses of vino….which always helps open my mind up….

i went with a friend last night and saw ‘ a movie’ …….in which i also read the book….probably 3 or 4 years ago…..and let me tell you…… i bawled….actually the whole theatre was bawling……and this is a story of a family of three children…just like myself.

And i felt as a mother of 3 children that even though i love each of the three the same……the firstborn is and will always be a firstborn.

We mothers of more than 2 children know how much energy goes into our first child…..they are not competing with other children…we have more time with them……we dote on them…..

it is a fact.

I am a lucky girl.

I know this.

I don’t know what it is like to have a sick child…..

or to lose a child.

I can’t imagine what a family goes through because of a situation like this.

If you have….my heart goes out to you….

i know marriages only have a 30% success rate after the death of a child….

and i can totally understand why………as a mother…….my whole being would be about my child ……
all the while knowing that when i married my husband we told each other that our marriage would always be first and foremost…..even before the children……..marriage first…children second……
both of our parents are still married and hold the same values…..

so i cruise on cruise control………and i think alot of us do……