the marshmallow club

{That is me….before i joined the club….circa 4/10}

First of all…..i was somehow initiated into this club called….

THE MARSHMALLOW CLUB

i didn’t ask to be….nor did i want to be…but somehow…i’m one of it’s members.

But today….thursday…i’ve taken the first step into trying to get out of this club.

The Marshmallow Club makes you do things you would never normally do.

You are made to eat candy hearts by the handful.

They frown upon you snacking on fruits and veggies.

You are made to meet up with friends and order QUESO FONDIDO.

They secretly order you another MOJITOย when you know you should only have one.

They screw with the hot setting on your dryer and make your jeans shrink.

They even do that knowing you already had to pull out your fat girl jeans to wear.

They really love it when you eat peanut butter by the spoonful.

They call your gym and cancel your membership.

They make you feel like a fool when you do show up at gym and you are denied access.

They encourage your husband to buy a dress two sizes too small just to see your reaction.

They fool with the numbers on your scale while you sleep at night.

They make sure their own people are working at VS when you go in and buy undergarments.

They laugh because they make you try on a size large.

They laugh some more knowing that size fits perfectly.

They secretly have a friend you haven’t seen in a while ย ask if you’re on steroids.

They make you think it’s just your thyroid out of control.

They make you eat popcorn with butter at the movie theater even though they know you hate it.

They even have you ย get a refill.

Extra butter topping please.

They ย make you show up at Target the day after Valentines to stock up on the 50% off candy.

They have your friends stop by with cupcakes or freshly baked chocolate croissants.

So………i just want you to beware of this club….because it’s there…and it’s taken me hostage.


Comments

  1. I know that club well!

  2. I’m with ya babe. A few months and we’ll be the toned, tanned, skinny chicks at the pool. But once we lose, can we go back to mojitos and queso?

  3. You are too funny! I love it.

  4. Oh my goodness, I love Queso!
    Good luck to you, can’t wait to see the results when you are completely rid of this club!

  5. I have been a member of the Marshmallow Club too. Morning ritual, large Dr. Pepper and bagel from Panera..wondered why i gained 10 pounds. I think Iowa is the birthplace of the Marshmallow Club…because I got extra soft when I lived there.

  6. They took my hostage many years ago. I want out, too!!!

  7. not proud to say, I’m an official, card carrying member!

  8. Oh Kasi,

    Despite all these things you claim this club is doing to you and your body, you still manage to look absolutely beautiful. Are you eating the mini marshmallows, while everyone else is forced to eat the regular size? I KNEW IT! ๐Ÿ˜‰

  9. Sadly Im a member too. Once they get a hold of you they like to keep ya. I actually was on my way to Target for the 50% off candy and did not go. I knew it was to dangerouse for me. I stopped at walgreens though. I only bought two small boxes of chocolates and some red hots.(for the kids :).
    As I painfully walked to the counter (carrying all my guilt) I looked up to see the lady in front of me. She ahd 18 peppermint patties and 138 reeses peanut butter cups in a BOX. She looked at me and I said (“Hungry?) It was mean, and I know it was mean but it made me feel better. Is that wrong? She lied. She said they were for her huband and son. YOU KNOW SHE LIED. She looked at my three little things and she was in envy of my willpower… ๐Ÿ™‚
    .

  10. Kasey. I posted back during your Q&A about also living in Colorado. I had mentioned that I recently moved to Virginia Beach. Living in Colorado for 10 years you manage to sometimes never even put on a bathing suit during the summer. Now I live in my bathing suit. I am a runner and I run a lot. I figure my treat for all that running should be something really good like Chick Fil A fries and their sweet tea. I cannot stop myself.

  11. I think I belong to that club too, unfortuntely. And might I add, they especially like to mess with you right after you’ve had a baby. Darn club! On a side note though, you look adorable in that pic. So cute!

  12. trying to get out of that club myself!
    ๐Ÿ™‚

  13. You are so funny!!

  14. Feeling the same way… ugghhh.. and there are BATHING SUITS in Target!

  15. they also MAKE you subscribe to websites like http://www.sugarloco.com.

    You’re beautiful not matter what!

  16. I’ve been walking my dog while drinking margaritas. That’s a wash, right? At least I’m wearing easy tone shoes

  17. you always make me smile……………………………….

  18. LOL!! Trying to get out of the club currently myself!!

  19. ha ha! This is a club that many of us belong to…have a great day! You are the best!

  20. Wait, I’m in that club too! I love it. What is wrong with me?

  21. I defintely am a member!!

  22. haha- they have taken me hostage too! Let me out!

  23. Okay Kasey, I think those Marshmallow club people have infiltrated my town too. As a matter of fact, I just went and had my thyroid tested last week. My sister has hypothyroid, so I figured it could possibly be that. Nope. It’s just a lack of self control.

    But I starte Zumba this week. Love it. Hopefully it will melt away a few of these Marshmallow club pounds. sigh.

  24. I am not only a member….I am the “Stay Puff” of the group! LOL
    (aka “Stay Puff Marshmallow Man” from Ghostbusters)

    And I really want to know why they bust out the bathing suits in February….really? REALLY? Like I really want to go into the dressing room and look like a real, fluffy, white marshmallow. Eeeewww…..
    On that note, Im going to have a cup of hot chocolate – with some whip cream of course ๐Ÿ˜‰
    Later –

  25. how wrong is it that I didn’t mind getting the stomach flu last week?
    i have to get my huge behind in a bathing suit in exactly one month…
    and i was hoping it would help matters.
    it didn’t.
    even with the pukes the scale keeps going up and i keep wearing the fat girl jeans.
    i’m hoping some spray tan might help…or maybe i’ll just be a toasted marshmallow.
    cheers.

  26. sounds like there are enough marshmallows around here to make ooey gooey rice krispy treats, or smores, or something else delicious ๐Ÿ™‚ me too!!! i picked up the book “clean” by dr. alejandro junger in the airport several weeks ago as i was finishing off my rasberry white chocolate scone from the coffee bean (feeling ultra marshmallowy that day)- read it cover to cover… bought a juicer the minute i got home, i was so inspired – and am on day 10 of a 21 day cleanse… (with a week of “elimination diet” prior to starting)… it aint much fun – and it forbids things like coffee… and *GASP* wine… and sugar – but it’s only 21 days right? i am down 11 lbs… so – i’m a beliver! oh – gwneth paltrow did it to – she blogged about it on goop… just an idea for all the ladies out there. i will tell you – that making sugar cookies with royal icing, sprinkles and candy hearts w/ my son on valentines day (AND NOT EATING ONE) was serious torture – but worth it!

  27. Dangit! I was somehow enlisted into that club too! help!!!!!

  28. Its the darn winter months that created the club….I’m fitting to get out too.
    Xo,
    LuLu

  29. oops…fighting to get out and toned!!!

  30. :)))

  31. You crack me up. I was just thinking about this today…as I tried to button my jeans around my February muffin top. Oy!

  32. For my initiation they made me eat rice krispy treats over and over again. My husband believes it’s an occult, and is begging for my release. I have told him it is just not that easy, they are friends at this club. I’m right there with you!
    ~G~

  33. Grinning knowingly to myself as I read this, wishing I could give you a big hug then laugh hard at us and our foibles. ๐Ÿ™‚ A couple weeks ago I took a deep breath and decided it was time to care for my body again – to make healthy things so delicious I didn’t even notice I was being good. I’m happier now, taking little walks every other day, and I can see the difference. ๐Ÿ™‚ Cheers to you as you decide what is best for you. ๐Ÿ™‚

  34. hysterical as always. i never fail to laugh so hard i pee my pants whenever i visit here! ๐Ÿ™‚

  35. MAN!
    I knew they had to be them out there- you just confirmed it!

  36. You are part of no club that involves marshmallows – do you understand me??? You are in “winter hibernation” mode, and it is coming to an end as spring arrives. Thus, you will cease eating candy, increase activity now that the frigid temps are going, and pull out those darling spring dresses. Like the ones you wore in France. Almost a year ago. {sniff}
    xx

  37. My girlfriend and I went out to lunch today to discuss that same exact club and how addicting it is! since we had some serious business to talk about we decided to have a couple of those Mojitos you mentioned, lol!

    Megan

  38. Being winter is no excuse to be in the club, as its summer here in Aus and I had to take my skinny jeans off this morning, admit defeat and go to the comfy fat jeans.
    Btw whoever mentioned Zumba, it rocks and I am a big believer. Just have to get there more than once a week and stop eating the cakes and biscuits I am baking for kids lunch boxes. *Sigh.*
    Having had 4 babies probably hasn’t helped the state of my stomach either!!

  39. This is hi-larious! Same things happening here – blasted spoonfuls of peanut butter (which I’m ashamed to say I roll in chocolate chips!), too many alcoholic drinks, dryer shrinking my jeans again, groaning as I tug on the fat girl jeans…. Marshmallow Club whatever, you still rock!

  40. wow, this is the name to the club that I secretly joined!! thanks for the information and awareness that I needed!!

    How do you get out?? Let us know if you find the secret door out!!

  41. Oh so familiar with that club:) Thanks for making me laugh at myself today! Now, I’m off to eat a piece of fruit…gotta get out of that marshamllow world;)

  42. have to say, I have never been a part of that club.
    But I have been in other clubs just as tormenting…like the “eat nothing because you deserve nothing then land yourself on a therapists couch because you are smaller than a polly pocket and you still think you are fat” club.
    Yeah. Glad to be out of that club.

    I think you are in the talented and beautiful club.
    In fact. You just might be President.

  43. You are so creative and funny…..love it!

  44. Do I know that club?! I’m a Life long membre! Wonderfully said!

  45. Girl, I am in the club too! I have almost hit the 10 lb. mark and I do not like it! Sucks! My jeans are so tight that I am now wearing yoga pants:(

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