I was signed to write a new book deal.
My life in Hawaii.
kind of like the book…my life in france…except…i’m not in france…i’m in hawaii.
It’s not really a cook book life story either…unless you want to know how to boil elbow macaroni…
and then pour powdered cheese on.
this book is going to be all about my life here…surviving on wine…and macadamia nuts.
and kona coffee.
seriously…..if you really want to know about the rest of my life in hawaii…
it’s going to have to have some girls to help me out here.
Do you want to know who the girls are?
I will only tell you if you promise not to go crazy on me.
a deal is a deal.
okay…since you promised….i will tell you.
my babysitter arrived here…with her friend in tow.
That’s right….the babysitter.
babysitter: noun. person who watches children for a living…or person who watches
children in exchange for room and board in a tropical location.
Bryan and i had two GREAT date nights….and a trip out on a catamaran with the older
two kids while “the girls”….watched Fin.
The babysitter has a name…it’s Whitney.
Babysitter brought a friend…her name is Kristen.
and now bryan is headed home….
and i am here with the kids….and “the girls”.
The girls are only here till wedensday…but i feel SO OLD.
They are drinking bacardi and coke….i’m drinking wine.
They are getting ready to head out the door at 10 pm…i’m getting ready to hit the sack at 10pm.
They wear bikini’s….i wear a tankini.
They are ready to get a tattoo with some hawaiian meaning….
i’m ready to sit them down and tell them that it’s not such a great idea.
on the flip side though….
they have met all the “local” boys…who work at the “local” hotel pools….
so we spend each afternoon getting to know each of the hotels.
Did you know Colbie Callet is a local girl here.
yup….i’m in the know.
Did you know that Julia Roberts has a home right up the street….
uh huh….yes she does…and she has a little boy named Finn also.
I’ll let you know as soon as i hook up a play date between the two Fin’s.
I know you are wondering how the heck i scored a three week stint over here in the land of
avocado’s the size of small babies…..
my parents bought a place here…after spending years thinking about it.
i must have a lot on my mind…and feel the need to get it all out.
Lover boy left today…..after 8 days here….we dropped him off at the airport this afternoon.
Now i’m stuck with bacardi drinking..tattoo wanting…girls.
Funny thing is….there is a condo full of 20 something boys living next door.
good thing Whitney’s friend is getting her masters degree in divinity.
I have a good girl here…who’s the bf to my babysitter…and talks to my kids about bible verses.
I might just pour myself a bacardi and coke.
be right back….
I’m not a bacardi and coke type of girl.
pour me another glass of pinot grigio….please.
okay…glass is poured…and kids tucked nicely in bed.
since i have been on vacation….i have gained 15 pounds.
I had to pay someone to zip up my dress today.
it wasn’t pretty.
Best part about gaining weight is my once non existent ta-ta’s….now seem to spill over the top
of my new dress.
That made for some interesting chit chat on my date.
Did i mention i had a $6 date last night.
First of all…no need to pay the babysitter.
Second…babysitter bought us a bottle of wine…so we packed up that bottle…and drove a few miles
to a sheeee sheeee hotel. The kind of hotel where they valet park your car.
Except our car was a Ford Focus.
I hopped out of the Ford Focus…..with my bottle of wine nicely packaged in a plastic bag
from the grocery store…and a few plastic glasses.
good thing i didn’t have my jean shorts on.
Bryan and i walked thru the SWANKY decent hotel to sit and watch the sunset
from the beach.
As we were sitting on OUR log…another couple came walking by…and the man said…..
‘we’ve been coming here for 15 years…this is our log’…
to which bryan said….
‘have a seat….you are more then welcome to share it with us’….
and you know what….they did.
We watched the sunset together….all squashed upon this log.
Bryan whispered to me as we were sitting there…
‘do you think that’s his daughter’?…
to which i replied…..
um…i don’t think so.
Dad’s don’t bring a bottle of champagne to a secluded log in order to share it with their daughter.
At least my dad never did that.
Maybe yours did…and i am WAY.OUT.OF LINE.HERE.SUGGESTING.THAT.
glass of pinot in hand….macaroni dinner made and eaten…..
hotel pools have been swam in…..
and let me tell you….i have swam in the ocean….in the deep end…
and i mean….DEEP END….as in…out in the ocean…where there are SHARKS…
and i lived to tell about it.
Speaking of sharks……..
i don’t know how this picture got here….it must be the wine.
actually…it must be the bacardi and coke.
p.s. if you are mandies mumblings…email me…you just won an Anthro gift card.